Don't. Okay? Just don't.

Thanks to advances in medical technology, Dr. Louise Fectner in High Plains, NY can perform a prostate exam on Mr. Norman Scheckler in Big Bear, CA.

Either that or she's playing Metal Gear Solid with her old college roommate.

She's not saying, but she usually retches a little while doing prostate exams.

Oh, daddy.....

Portal 2 is all the rage today, but imagine if it was a cheesy 1970s B-movie.

Click for

larger

version

of

poster.

The future of law enforcement. (Unless people keep knocking him over, in which case he won't be.)

Click for

a far more

menacing

look at

this killing

machine.

Anyone who knows me knows I like Iron Man. I also like robots. And I especially like Iron Man fighting robots! Oh boy!

Click to

see a

bigger

version

of the

artwork

if your

senses

can

handle

it!

It's been an insanely long time since I last saw this. Save me, Netflix. Save me.

Click on

the image

to see a

larger

version

of this

crazy-great

poster by

Jeff Darrow!

One day, Keanu Reeves simply stopped caring anymore. That was a sad day.

Click for

larger

image of

Keanu

not

caring.

"Wait, this is the scary part with the dog. Don't look. Oh, wait, it's okay. Oh, no! Now it's the scary part! Don't look!"

Dear ___________, If you've received this postcard we'd like to invite you back in to retake your photograph.

I've always had a major soft sport for cats with blue eyes. It's like I have no choice but to do their bidding.

We've just got to do something about those dam goats!

"So, men. Here it is 1969 and we're standing around dressed like this. Anyone have any ideas of what to do next?"

Click

for a

larger

image

of the

hipsters!

Illustrator Audrey Kawasaki continues to craze and amaze me. Her art style is beautiful.

Click on images for larger versions and click here to visit Audrey's site.

Long abandoned Soviet monuments that look like leftovers from old sci-fi movies.

Tired of living? Now there's an answer. Optional coffee cup holder sold separately.

This has been determined to be the only genuine quote that Albert Einstein left behind.

Click

to

make

large.

This explains everything. I only wish I understood it.

There's enough of me for everyone, ladies. Well, of course not all at once. And I usually need a day or two between 'performances' to rest up.

Click

to make

the

whining

prisoner

larger.

I left mine on all day today. At least I think I did. Maybe I did and I'm dreaming now? HELLO! ECHO!!

It can't be a trap. I couldn't be. It's too obvious. Only a fool would fall for something like that. It must be real.

Obsolete appliances such as VCRs, cassette clock radios and typewriters have taken to spontaneous suicide over sitting on dusty garage shelves.